Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform?

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So you want tonight to be consensual or not?

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-Girl I'd go through anything for you. -Good than go through a blender!

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? -I'm an atheist.

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Pick up lines from the stone age: Fail. Man: Hello, you look beautiful, I speak very well, and if you allow me to make love with you, I promise I will protect you and raise the child with you :)! Woman: WHAT? A guy without wild chesthair that speaks instead of grunting and yelling? You to sex me and you do not even got a club? I am SOOO gonna go to Grogg instead! He has like the biggest club and knows how to really HIT a woman! Moral: I would say somethings do change, but Id rather be Grogg than the loser above, of course I prefer hitting ON women first, if that does not work I... Oh right, I am married :P

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jack sanders

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A 85 year old man was at a bar, he goes up to the first hot thing he sees and asks do I come here often?

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Sickman Fraud: Hmm you look remotely alike my mother... Woman: Uh? Sickman Fraud: Yes fucking you should das probably give me some release, die reason to resist me is not necessary, you envy my pingas and I can assign it to you if you put on this ugly wig and yell "bad boy" whilzt I das fukte das rassenhol... Woman: OMG SICK! Moral: The father of modern psychology? Seriously?! I was going for a bachelor in psychology studies, but its just disgusting.

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- Did you fall from heaven? - No, I dug my way up from Hell.

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Ya know what would look good on you? ME!

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The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Not as much as my dick.

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HI, DO YOU KNOW WHY THEY CALL ME DOCTOR RABBIT THE HYMEN DESTROYER? Nero the clit collector: Actually this works pretty good, just wear a random rabbit costume, cut a hole where your CAWCK is, and make sure they are girls under twelve or below (because it kinda loses its meaning with little boys but fuck it anyways, yeah fuck it! FUCK IT TO THE LIMIT!) I work at a daycare center: Because I care.

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Man - "Does this smell like chloroform to you?" Woman - "Yes it does."

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-Darling, I will never stop pursuing you. Even from the ends of the earth, I will follow you wherever you go. Really, I love you that much. -"Honey", I will call the police and have you thrown in jail for stalking me. Really, I hate you that much.

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - U and me - Grammer freak

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Guy: I think I got lost in your eyes. Girl: Here's a GPS. Go find yourself.

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Man: "Let's play Titanic. You'll be the Titanic, and I'll be the iceberg making you go down." Woman: "That would be a massive disaster."

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Your parents must be assholes...because you're the shit.

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My dog just died so now you're my only Bitch.

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You have a laugh like my favorite porn star.

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You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun so get in the van.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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