Hey baby you looking for a stud? Cuz I've got the STD and all I need now is U

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hey angel you duh sexy , if you duh rice i eat you everyday-pha haha

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A blond, a brunette and a black haired girl are all stuck on an island....stupid women.

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Do you believe in angels? Cool, what about goblins?

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Hey ladies ;) I like to post lots of anti-pickuplines! ;) Girls: WOW! I WANNA JOIN YOU HOME! ME TOO ME TOO! The anti-part: This will never happen in real life.

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- What's a shabby girl like you doing in a lovely place like this?

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Man: Do you work at Subway? Girl: Why? Did I just give u a 6 inch?

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Guy:My tummy hurts Girl: Oh!! Are you pregnant ? Guy: Yeah!!! With a baby elephant!! Girl:WHAT!!!! Guy: Yeah!! Wanna see its trunk

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Female: Why? Male: Cus you look like an inbred hick

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M - If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. F - Yeah, it's too bad that N and O are already together.

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Is that a banana in your pants? Can I have yours?

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Soon

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So I caught my sister masturbating the other day, it was like lol hahaha you filthy bitch! Then she was like DONT TELL ANYBODY PLEASE I WILL BUY YOU THOSE BOXING GLOVES YOU WANTED SO MUCH! PLEASE! And I was like, NUHUUUH! The bed is full of piss and I totally got this on my cellphone, so you gonna pull up your panti... Oh you still looking for them LOL! Yeah, that was the subject I brought up at a bar... Sober, unless Redbull counts as drunk... Anti Pickupline as FUCK! Players Dont Use RedBull -Richard Nixon or whatever.

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Do you believe in rape by first sight? Moral: I think its immoral enough as it is already.

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"Hmm...you'll do."

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Man - Hey hun.. .Can I kiss the most beautiful girl on the whole party? ;) Wowan - Hell no. Man - Ah, I see... And what about you? Can I?

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Hey this is crazy and I just met you so here's the kitchen a sandwich maybe?

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Hey big girl ;), why you alone? You ate all of your friends?

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I think your cute. I though you were cute, until I saw you...

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhyming get in the van.

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- Your place or mine? - Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

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You know, I had a great pickup line, but I just forgot it.

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Man: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven? Woman: Did it hurt when they kicked-- *sound of gun clicking* Woman: Thanks!

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Stop Footing Around

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!