Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

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Pick up lines from the stoneage: Man: RARGH GROG BEAT YOU WITH CLUB! AND MAKE THE LITTLE GROGS WITH YOU! Woman: But I just had one! Aww not this again whatever... Moral: And over time women adjusted to clubs and often end up knocked up when passing out in them, While men that own their own clubs usually end up knocking up a lot more of them... Some things never change...

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Man: Wanna come home watch my REALLY big stamp collection? ;) ;) Girl: Sure ;) ;) At home: Man: Why are you taking your clothes off? Girl: Uh... nevermind... Moments later: Man: And this one is a rare misprint from 1980, and this one is actually quite common but.., Girl: Sigh... :(

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at rhyming get in the van.

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Hey girl, is your name Ethiopian food? Because your playing hard to get.

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For Christmas I got some toy soldiers, To play with when I'm in bed, But I got bored with my seargents and majors, So I played with my privates instead.

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Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Boy: When a tractor fell on your face?

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If you were a booger, I would pick up you first.

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That King that said: Kill all male babies... Lets say he was a teenager? Moral: Excellent job son, but you see, sharing is caring, have a victory drink!... Thing is... I don't care... rest well...For eternity... Hughman Heffer... The seed has been sown... you got nothing on me...

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Lesbihonest

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Gurl, I'll do you like I do my homework. Slam you on the table and do you all night long!

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Do you like a trimmed bush? Because I'm a gardener. Here's my business card, call me, seriously I need the work.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Not as much as my dick.

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Shaved your beard, so I can see you're a woman.

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*is your name angel cuz that's all i see? *is your name asshole cuz that's all i see

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You remind me of America. How so? Because you so fat!

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What's a good comeback if a guy asked me "Bring me a sandwich"?? -COmeback with the goddamn sandwich

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can i just touch your face for like, a couple seconds.

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Your parents must be assholes...because you're the shit.

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I couldn't help but notice you from the other side of the bar. You look way better from over there.

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Mens most noob things to say during sex: "Thank you" "Do I really get all this for free?" "Sure you don't want me to pay you?" "MOTHER!" *crying* "You`re wet down there! Did you just pee yourself? DISGUSTING!!!" "I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!" "STOP SUCKING CUZ IM ABOUT TO CUM!!"

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Guy: Have you ever been surfing? Girl: No; Yes Guy: Wanna surf in my jizz?

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Do you know karate? Because I'd like to kick you in the face.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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