girl, are you a christian? Sure... Do you believe in me? I dont even know you! Well, met God? No? You love him!

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J.B: You smile, I smile. Girl: I wasn't smiling...

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Don't turn this rape into a murder.

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B: Can I have your number ? G: Sure.. 666

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Male: Want to hear a story about my d--k? Nevermind, it's too long. Female: Want to hear a story about my vagina? Nevermind, you won't get it.

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- I can make your bed rock. - Oh yeah? An earthquake can too..

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The ability to speak with dead relatives but only whilst masturbating

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Yet another one from real life: At law school: Kid to woman: Why don't I ever get any of you?! *Woman laughs* Me: You could start by not whining so much... Kid: That wont ever work! You know that is bullshit! Its not like I am whining I just whine whenever blahblahblah... Me: Sigh... Girl: He is kinda cute... Me: Wha? Moral: Not a real anti joke, since I had not heard from any of them until today, I just got invited to their wedding...

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Man, stay alive, I dont even got time to read that shit. See you around son.

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Do you work at subway? Because i often enjoy eating there and i think the food is good. I do not eat there every day because i do not want to get over weight.

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Do you wanna go halves in a bastard?

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Are you a fart? Because you just blew me away.

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I think your cute. I though you were cute, until I saw you...

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(this is only funny if ur a guy!) you go to a party im a man you get a drink im a man you laugh with friends im a man u see a hot chick im a man you invite her over to ur place im a man you go up in the bedroom im a man you go to pull her pants off im a man and she says... im a man!

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You're ugly, but you intrigue me.

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Woman and man on picnicking date at the forest: (Man gets bit in his pingas by a snake..) Man: ARGH! HEALP HEALP! Woman: OMG! I have to call the doctor! RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING Doctor! My date was bitten by a poisonous snake! What can we do! Doctor: The only option would be to suck the poison out of the bitten area or else he will probably die... "Click" Man: ARGH! WHAT DID THE DOCTOR SAY! PLEASE ITS GETTING NUMB! WHAT DID HE SAY! Woman: He said you are gonna die... :( Moral: She may not have sucked, but this sure did :P

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Male: What's on your mind? Female: How bad you must be at sex.

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- You must be a parking ticket cause you have fine written all over you - You must be a wellfare check then.

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Baby, I'm no Flintstone, but I can sure make your bed rock...

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#1 You're breath smells like Skittles, can I taste the rainbow? No, because , while mine may smell like Skittles, yours reeks. #2 Girl: Hey, I got this new Kiss Proof lip gloss, wanna try it out? (there are 2 answers to this) 1.Boy: Well, yours may be Kiss Proof, but mines not, and I don't have time to re-apply this after 2. Yeah, I do want to try it out, but not with you.

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Roses are red violets are blue i got a gun get in the van!

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-Are you the sun? -No.. Why? -Because you need to stay 93,000,000 miles away from me.

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Hey girl, I May not be Fred Flinstone but I can make your bed rock! ;)

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sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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