Why did the small girl run away? She saw her own coqu in the mirror.

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You must be tired... I assume you are because I am after following you on your four mile run through the park today.

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- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

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Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

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are you on fire?

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Every kiss begins with K ;) Yeah to bad ugly begins with U

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-Excuse me do you know how much a polar bear weighs? -Enough to break the ice? -Ummm... yea... *silence*

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Are you a magnet because I'm attracted to you No, but I am trained in several martial art, so get the heck away from me

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Are you a magnet, because i'm attracted to you. Yes, i am. So unless you want to have sex with metal, then i suggest you leave.

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You're a bit heavier but i think I can fit you in a barrel.

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I'll drop my standards, if you drop your pants ;)

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Is your father a gardener? -No, why? ..Because I was wondering what a cactus like you doing in a place like this.

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-Hi. Didn’t we go on a date once? Or was it twice? -Must’ve been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

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what's a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?

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How you doin? go away- I have a gun

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That King that said: Kill all male babies... Lets say he was a teenager? Moral: Excellent job son, but you see, sharing is caring, have a victory drink!... Thing is... I don't care... rest well...For eternity... Hughman Heffer... The seed has been sown... you got nothing on me...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was born beautiful, But what the hell happened to you!

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Man: I can control all women in the world! Guys: WOOOOT YEAH! Me: I can control all men! Guys: Huh?? Man: What the fuck is that good for you like guys or something? Wait hey let go of me! Moral: And off the endless cliff you all go MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!... Ladies, it seems it is up to us to repopulate this world, not sure if we can make it, but I shall do my best, but since I am just one, you better do all the moving, so I can conserve my energy.

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Guy: Are you looking for a hot, sexy, fertile young man? Girl: No thanks, I used to be one.

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Me: Have you ever dreamed, of owning a thousand sparkly gems? Woman: No why? You got some? Me: No, but now but now we can dream together t under the sparkling stars under the sky... Moral: Hey, she said aww... And touched my hand before chatting with her friend... and as I turned my hand... was a piece of paper, with a written number...

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Nero: My name is Nero... Woman: Why I mean you aint black? Nero: Sure about that? Moral: In the Darkness... We are all the same...

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guy: wanna make some money? girl: Na, I do it for free, i'm offering free herpes

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Man: Lady... Seriously, I got a PhD! Woman: Seriously, you look more like an athlete, in what? Man: Lady... I got a pretty huge Richard. Moral: RICHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS!

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guy: you're so beautiful, did you fall from heaven? girl: if I was I would be dead by now hun?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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