- Anti-Pickup Line

- You must be tired, you've been running through my mind all day. -No, your mind is so small I can't even take a step in it!

Boy: does your face hurt Girl: No. Why Boy Because it sure is hurting me

- I would love to get into your pants... - You can't: I have an asshole in there already.

Girl, did it hurt when you got dragged up all the way from hell? Moral: The hell with morals!

"Hmm...you'll do."

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Him: Does your dad own a bakery? Her: Yes, Why? Him: Because I saw his advertisement in the newspaper

If i'd ask you if you want to f*ck me, would your answer be the same as to this question?

Are you an angel? 'Cause you're the only ten I see.

Is your father a gardener? -No, why? ..Because I was wondering what a cactus like you doing in a place like this.

Guy: Roses are red Violets are blue Girl:Violets aren't blue there violet... dumbass read a book

B: Hey C do you wanna go out with me? C: Sorry B I only go out with guy's who come after me

Man: I would kill anyone at anytime for a kiss from you. Woman: Kill yourself now.

Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

Hey girl, you must have fallen from heaven, because you're so old you should have died already and so ugly that they must have kicked you out as soon as you got there.

You remind me of America. How so? Because you so fat!

Me: Hey lady, you are so fucking hot I want to... Lady: FUCK ME PLEASE ME SO HORNY! Moral: One can always dream... yawn Zzzzzzzmooth...

Gurl, I'll do you like I do my homework. Slam you on the table and do you all night long!

Waiter- For you, sir? Male: I'll have a Strawberry Daquiri, non-alcoholic, please. Waiter- And, for your company? Male: For her, a long-island-iced-tea, with a twist of Rohypnol.

Why was the little boy crying? Because he dropped his hamster in the garbage disposal

Girl, wanna fuck rite now? Sure! Man! You are such a hoe! walks away disgusted Moral: Be careful for what you ask for.

Damn girl did you just come from the dump? Cause you smell like shit.

Hey baby! If I said you had a good body, would you hold it against me? - [ It's unknown who originally said this. Maybe it was some rowdy guy in a 1970s disco].

Dude: I don't wanna be friends anymore! Dudette: I take it that you found out about my feelings. Dude: Yes. And, at the rate this is going, staying where we are now gets us nowhere. Dudette: sparkly eyes So... you mean... Dude: Yes. We are more than friends. I realize that you have realized that. In fact... steps to whisper in her ear ... we're like BROTHERS. Dudette: 3

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!