Boy: whats your name? Girl: i dont know, im just s fetus

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-If you are looking at a girl and she says What are you looking at? -I thought you were good looking, but I was mistaken.

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GET IN THE VAN!!!

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rohypnol. rape drug

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on a scale from 1 to 10, when did you lose your virginity?

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- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

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Guy : Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Girl : No, why? Guy : Because I can totally see myself in your pants!

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A polar bear and a penguin were taking a bath. The polar bear asked the penguin to pass the soap. the penguin responded by saying,"What do i look like a microwave?"

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What happens when a drunk swedish man prank calls 911 from a local bar? The ambulance comes

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Male: Are you from Tennessee? Female: Why? Male: Cus you look like an inbred hick

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roses are red violets are blue My dog gives me a bigger orgasm then you

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Guy: I think I got lost in your eyes. Girl: Here's a GPS. Go find yourself.

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Man: Hey is your name Zelda? Woman: Huh? What kind of stupid name is THAT! Man: EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME PRINCESS! Woman: What a dork... Moral: The man did not link with the woman that night... nor ever it seems...

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Do you want to dance No I suppose a blow job is out of the question then

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Man: HELP! I am dying of disease and have only one day left to live! My only wish... "sob" is to procreate... to have a son or a daughter... Woman: Aww... well maybe I can help you... Man: :D I cant believe it (tears in eyes) Woman: What are you dying of? Man: Aids... Woman proceeds to disappear in a ball of smoke. Moral of the story: Dunno find it yourself ffs I dont even know why people read this crap... funny typing it though.. thumbs ups for that :D

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there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

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- hey baby i wanna show you something - wait i wanna show you something too -what is it? -my fists

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Nice legs... what time do they open? Cos there is a pungent fish smell and I think you need to wash.

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My penis just died. Can I bury it in your ass?

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Man: Do you work at Subway? Girl: Why? Did I just give u a 6 inch?

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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I'll eat your poop

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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