Baby! you're on fire! Yeah, well I am an arsonist.

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-What`s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar? -What`s it like being the biggest liar in the world?

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if i was a fly, i'd be all over you, because you are the SHIT.

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Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together Woman: What does ui spell?

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i would traval the earth for you. well then im going to the moon.

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-hey girl, you must be a pirate cause you got a lot of booty

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M: You make me wanna be a terrorist! W: Why? M: I so wanna blow on you right now...

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Does the carpet match the drapes? -Do I look bald?

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Man: Wanna come home watch my REALLY big stamp collection? ;) ;) Girl: Sure ;) ;) At home: Man: Why are you taking your clothes off? Girl: Uh... nevermind... Moments later: Man: And this one is a rare misprint from 1980, and this one is actually quite common but.., Girl: Sigh... :(

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Hello my name is Horny and... oops... I got it wrong didn't I?

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Girl - You smell nice, what have you got on? Boy - I have a hardon but i didn't think you could smell it.

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Man: Hey sexy, I think I have seen you many times before... Woman: Hmmm... I do not think I have seen you before... Man: Do you happen to be used to getting raped? Woman:...... Moral: yeah it was her :( Audience: BOOOOOOOOOO! Moral: I know :(

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Guy: Can I have your number ? Girl: We are six.

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For the males that do not know what I mean with "woman screams" comment below... well HAHAHAHAHAH LOSERS LOOOOOOOOOOOSEEEEEEEEERS! Moral: Read a book about females more interesting parts one day you lazy bastard... as for the girls... I am not talking about anything bad nor dirty... just 12 hour orgasms and such nice things... WHAT? YOU GONNA TELL ME THAT IS HORRIBLE? Well in that case you dont know what you are missing... and you wont ever know.... Ps: Can you believe I am actually trying to get thumbs downs but keep getting upped? Thanks for accepting my ever growing controversial nature, lets keep it that way and soon moral man will uh... receive a medal for uh... well a small keychain for... uh... you know what? Never mind.

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He i would love to have sex with you She. I know but you have aids

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-Hey, is there a fire extinguisher around here? 'Cause you're smoking hot. -Actually, there IS a fire extinguisher. I was about to slam you in the face with it.

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Do you work at subway? Because i often enjoy eating there and i think the food is good. I do not eat there every day because i do not want to get over weight.

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Hey girl! Faggot.

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- Hey, what do you do for a living? - Female impersonator

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Your eyes are the color of my toilet water.

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-Girl I'd go through anything for you. -Good than go through a blender!

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hi how u doin fine and u well bii have a nice day DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO

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Girl- Hey ily Boy- say it it just makes it that much better ;) Girl- I'm leaving you

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-Do you come here often? -I'm about to.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!