Dating tips 101: First you find a girl that likes you. Then you realize no girl likes you. Moral: Lesson done.

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Boy- I'm heading back to my place. Want to come? Girl-Sorry you strike me as a person who cums all by himself.

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Man: There is a U and I in beautiful Woman: Ya, but there is only a U in ugly

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-Did it hurt -What when i fell from heaven? -No when you fell from the ugly tree and hit every single branch on the way down

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Guy: I got you a gift. It's a Necklace. Girl: Awww thats so nice. Guy: BAZINGA Its my dick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -To get to the other side.

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Are you from Ireland cause my penis is dublin'

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Did it hurt? When you fell from the hoe tree and banged every dick on the way down?

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boy: my dick is 10 inches girl: mine's too

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-Your feet must be tired 'cuz you've been running through my mind. -Yea, I was running away from you.

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Hey baby, are you Star Trek? Because I watch you every night in the darkness.

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Ma'am, I'm sorry I'd like to ask a favour. Yes? Well, my penis died and I was wondering if I could bury it in your vagina?

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- Did it hurt? - Yes.

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That outfit looks fantastic on you... ..it would look even better in an evidence bag

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Guy: What does a girl like you doing to a place like this? Girl: Trying to get away from you

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Superman enters a bar: Superman: Ladies... who wants to try out my newly developed "super orgasmi-power"? Women: Did you not die? Superman: Uh no... it was just a uh... healing coma... *All the women fall into a "healing coma* Superman: *scratches head* Well... I kinda asked for this... Moral:*Healing coma*

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Did it hurt when you burst through the concrete emerging from hell? Yes, yes it did.

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Are you Jamaican? Because I love black women

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Girl: Do you know any good movies? Boy: Snakes on a plane Girl: Whats it about? Boy: It's about Horses.. on a boat.

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Guy: You must put sugar in your cereal every morning... Girl: Why cause I am so sweet :) Guy: No because you haven't been able to see your toes in at least 20 years...

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Farewell to thy, you have been most amusing. Moral: Has left the building.

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Do you have Groupon? *wait for response* Because you look fucking cheap

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Sung to the melody of Ozzy`s: "Moral Man" HEES THE MORAL MAN, IIIS HEE MORAL OR IS HE DEAD? HEES THE MORAL MAN AAARE THERE MORALS INSIDE HIS HEEAD. Moral: NOOO THERE ISNT! ONLY IMMORAL INSIDE! AND ILL KEEP POSTING, ONLY TO CRUSH YOUR INSIDES! *guitar solo begins*

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Well there's the exit, will you go out with me?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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