-I better drive you home, miss. Because you're a woman and you can't drive. Get it?

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Man: Wanna come see my collection of stamps? ;) Woman: Actually id prefer we go to your place have sex ;) Man: GEEEEEEEZ! What does a man have to do to show off his stamp collection here?

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- You look really nice - I know

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If you were a booger, that'd be pretty nasty.

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Male: I would die for you... Female: Prove it

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At a bar. M: I so wanna sex you! W: What? :) M: What part of sex did you not get? VAGINA! W: You have problems with your heart? (angina) :( M: Stop screwing with me bitch! W: I dont have no itch... :/ *The man gets insulted and leaves* Woman: Cute guy, I wish I wasn't nearly deaf though... Moral "patience is a virtue?" Hell no! The guy got laid with 6 women that day so the moral is "The more people listen to what you have to say, the more you will get laid this day, and a deaf woman is a challenge if she aint your way"

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Why did the small girl run away? She saw her own coqu in the mirror.

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there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

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Hi, I've taken like 8 dumps today... Wanna dance?

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- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

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-My love for you is like diarrhea, I cant hold it in...

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Hey chicks! I am a very experienced suicide bomber, I was even in the plane that blew up the world trade center A ;) ¨ Moral: This must be the worst pickupline ever for oh so many reasons on so many levels...

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Male: are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see. Female: no, I'm from Idaho. Because I da ho.

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Man: Hey is your name Zelda? Woman: Huh? What kind of stupid name is THAT! Man: EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME PRINCESS! Woman: What a dork... Moral: The man did not link with the woman that night... nor ever it seems...

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him: your like the sun in the morning. her: that so sweet! him: Your very big and i can even stare at you for more then 2 secondes.

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Girl:Want to go out this Friday? Boy: No I like to stay inside. Girl: No I mean are you free this Friday? Boy:No Im expencive!

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Male: Did it hurt??? Female: What, when I fell from heaven? Male: No, the first time you did anal!!!

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Guy: You must put sugar in your cereal every morning... Girl: Why cause I am so sweet :) Guy: No because you haven't been able to see your toes in at least 20 years...

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M: Wanna play dynamite? W: what's that? M: I lie on my back and you blow the sh** out of me.

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-You are so lovely. -DOES NOT COMPUTE...

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Do you believe in love at first hear? Because ive never dated a blind chick before.

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If I asked you out on a date, would your answer to that question be the same as your answer to this question?

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-how much does a polar bear way. -half as much as you (for fat girls)

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- I'd like to call you. What's your number? - It's in the phone book. - But I don't know your name. - That's in the phone book too.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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