-Darling, I will never stop pursuing you. Even from the ends of the earth, I will follow you wherever you go. Really, I love you that much. -"Honey", I will call the police and have you thrown in jail for stalking me. Really, I hate you that much.

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if you were my sister i'd totally get with you.

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Your body would look good in my trunk.

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I would take a bullet for you. In COD. JK THAT WOULD RUIN MY KILLSTREAKS

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Wanna have sex?

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Have you just been fishing? The strong fishy smell seems to be coming from you.

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- Your body is like a temple. - Sorry, there are no services today.

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Male: Get in the van.

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can i take a dump in your mouth?

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Nice Shirt. It would look better on my bedroom floor.

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Come lay your head upon my chest. (After a moment) Perhaps you'd be more comfortable onmy stomache (pushes head down)

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A man is pulled over by a police officer and a conversation takes place: Man: What's the problem officer? Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone. Man: No sir, I was going 65. Wife: Oh Steven. You were going 80. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.) Cop: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light. Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light! Wife: Oh Steven, you've known about that tail light for weeks. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.) Cop: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt. Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car. Wife: Oh Steven, you never wear your seat belt. Man: Shut your mouth, woman! Cop: Ma'am, does your husband always talk to you this way? Wife: No, only when he's drunk.

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Did you just fart? 'cos you blew me away

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- Can I have your number? - Sure. Twelve.

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What do u get when u mix a black a guy and an octopus The best dam cotton pickin machine you'll ever see!

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Every kiss begins with K. Except for ugly, that begins with U.

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Girl: You look so happy, I am glad this is working out. Freud: Maaaaan I was just thinking about fucking my mom! Moral: Sickman Fraud.

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Man: Hey lady... you new here? I havent seen you around here before ;) Woman: Im your wife! >:/ Man: Which one of them? I have married so many sluts just to get sex with them... that I forget about...

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Let's not turn this rape... into a murder

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Don't turn this rape into a murder.

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I've got a black belt in lovin'.

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" Grab your coat love ...it's cold in my basement"

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-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? -I'm an atheist.

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why are you you touching me ????

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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