Male: Do you know if there is an airport around here? Cause my heart took off, when I saw you... Female: Yeah? Well my heart crashed in the Hudson River when I saw you!

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Guy: Have you ever been to Thailand? Girl: No Guy: Well maybe I should take you to Bangkok

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Man: Lady... Seriously, I got a PhD! Woman: Seriously, you look more like an athlete, in what? Man: Lady... I got a pretty huge Richard. Moral: RICHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS!

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Mario: Its a me Mario! Woman: Uhuh... Mario: Its a me Mario? Woman: Yeah you got a point? Mario: Okey dokey! Woman: So? Mario: Letsa go! Woman: Well okay, I mean *chews bubblegum* at least I know who you are and stuff... Moral: I once saw a red mushroom come out of a question block, so I just touch it with my Richard and... ...Wait ill take the green one, just in case, I good with what I have...

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Nero: My name is Nero... Woman: Why I mean you aint black? Nero: Sure about that? Moral: In the Darkness... We are all the same...

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M - wanna have some fun? F - No! M - 0k, i have no choice but to rape you!

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do you clean your pants with windex cause i can see myself in them

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Lesbihonest

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The word of the day is 'legs' , The word of tomorrow is Aardvark .

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In a loud bar: Man: Do you enjoy gRape? Woman: HOW DARE YOU YOU PERVERT! Man: Uh... how about raisins then... Woman: Err... can you repeat that first question again... Moral: I would but I would have to bypass the censorship somehow...

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Man: GET IN THE VAN! Woman: NO! Man: Well... How about the Limo? Its got beverages and caviar and... Woman: OOH :D Moral: Always go for the limo first,

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Man: Yeah I have done it with thousands of women all around the world... THOUSANDS! Woman: Okay... then ill come home with you, I want an experienced man to be my first... At his house: Woman: I AM SCARED! Will it hurt? Its my first time and... Man: I dunno! I am scared as Its my first time too! :( Moral: A man whose is scared of sex... pfffffff!

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Male: I have a large penis female: so do i.

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I put the STD in STuD all i need is U!

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You must be tired... I assume you are because I am after following you on your four mile run through the park today.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put "U" and "I" as far apart as possible.

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Man: Do you like a sensitive guy? Women: Yeah, I used to be one.

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Nice legs what time do they open

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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Are your parents retarded? Because you sure are special.

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Want to get a pizza and fuck? What you don't like pizza?

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Shy-guy: Hey uh, girl, we have been on like 40 dates, what do you um... You know say we go to my place for once and have some drinks? Shy-girl: Eh, well su-sure I mean its been over forty dates, but ill just take coffee if its oka... Shy-guy: OMG YOU DAMN EASY SKANK! HOLY SHIT YOU WHERE GONNA GIVE IT ALL WHERE YOU NOT? LOL NO TIME FOR DESPERATE BlTCHES! Moral: Not to be confused with the slightly less popular Nintendo character Shy Guy

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Man: Hey yo sexy, wanna do it in the toilet so I can brag about banging the prom queen? The toilets are dirty but I got aids anyways and... Fine brit Lady: Eh well sire, you see... SURE! Moral: ANTICLIMACTIC ENDING SUCCESS!

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Guy:My tummy hurts Girl: Oh!! Are you pregnant ? Guy: Yeah!!! With a baby elephant!! Girl:WHAT!!!! Guy: Yeah!! Wanna see its trunk

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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