- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Guy: Did it hurt? Girl: Did what hurt? Guy: When you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down

there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I cant rhyme, ever since my dog and I were walking down the street and then he died and then i cried and then i died and then he cried

-Hey, baby, What's your sign? -Stop.

(in a loud club) -Do you wanna dance?! -Umm, with YOU? NO! -What?! oh no, i said, "you look FAT in those PANTS!"

-There's a 'U' in beautiful. -Yeah, and there's a 'U' in ugly.

Are you on your period, because there's a blood stain on your pants

my dick is 2 inches

Roses are red Violets are blue Go out with me Or you face'll be those colors, too!

so... you're a girl,huh?

my love for you is like diarrhea. i can never hold it in

-Insert man's line here- -Wanna get laid?- -TOTALLY!- -Crawl up a chicken's ass and wait.-

Is that a ladder in your hose or the stairway to heaven? It is the stairway to heaven, but I've already got an asshole up there

Roses are red. Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

Male: You are a Drugs? Female: Why? because your so addicted to me? Male: Nope, You ruined my life!

Guy: Are you looking for a hot, sexy, fertile young man? Girl: No thanks, I used to be one.

-Do you come here often? -I'm about to.

Whatever I'll just date myself.

Does it smell in here or it just you?

Guy: You look like a suitable mate and I'd thoroughly enjoy engaging in rough, sweaty sex with you and your lady parts.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book