I'm jealous of every girl that hugs you, Because for that one second she held my entire world.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because I have a lot of family that lives there, maybe we're related.

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-Hi Honey I'm home! -I'm not talking to you! -Oh, Okay. -Don't you want to know why? -No, I trust and respect your decision dear

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Your breast is like a beer holder, you would allow me to store beer in between your breasts, while I talk on the phone

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Guy: Theres this girl and Ive been meaning to ask her something... Girl: I bet I know who it is ;D Guy: Oh good. So is your mom available on Friday?

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Hey baby, wanna make $50?

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Dating post: "Nice male looking for female company, I have a steady job and would prefer if you too had a job, you will be particularity happy if you have a small penis fetish. Signed BIGPENIS19INCHESJIMlight sleeper

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Man: Wanna (censored)? Woman: (Censored) you man!

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together -The order of the alphabet is arbitrary. It's not my fault that you kept U and I apart.

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So, I hear you want to rape Nathan Skye's body.

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How much do you like peanut butter?

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Roses are red violets are blue i got a gun get in the van!

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The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

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Wanna come home to my star destroyer and play with my lightsaber? No? How about just a trip down the Enterprise bridge to have fun with my romulans?... if you know what I mean? ;) ;)

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Grapist: I bet you like getting Graped, tied up and beaten muahahahahaha! I am so gonna do the worst things to you! Woman: YES PLEASE! Man: MAAAAAAAAAAAN your not fun anymore... Moral: Its not grape if she wants it... and I guess grapists dont like that... remember that girls whenever someone is gonna rape you just say YES unless they yell surprise though... then its surprise sex.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd take you out back in the shed and screw you!

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Are you from hogwarts, because I really want to put my basilisk into your chamber of secrets

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- Your body is like a temple. - Sorry, there are no services today.

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guy:do you know how much a polar bear weighs? girl: ..no, how much?? guy:i dunno but probly not as much as you

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that shirt looks nice on you, it would look better on the floor

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What did the blond do when the web page she was visiting didn't load? She checked if her wireless access had been somehow cut off and then hit the refresh button and waited for the page to load again.

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You look... clean

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(boy gives flowers to a girl) Girl: Are these for me? Boy: Nope, I just want you to hold them for me for a second..

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Your father must be a thief, because I saw him stealing at Target earlier.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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