Hey baby, are you Star Trek? Because I watch you every night in the darkness.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? 1000 pounds

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M - If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. F - Yeah, it's too bad that N and O are already together.

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Man - How was your trip from heaven? Woman - Great... until now.

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the word of the day is legs lets go to your house and spread the word

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-Hey baby wanna paint the whole town red? -Yeah, with your blood

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Stop Footing Around

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This doesn't have to be a rape.

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Him. "I'd sure like to get into your pants." Her. "No thanks. One asshole in my pants is my limit."

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The power to type any pointless superpower at the wrong place... ...shit...

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- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? - No but I scraped my knees when I climbed up from hell

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Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Do you have cancer, because you look diseased.

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Guy enters a bar: Guy: I have some really bad self-esteem and would really apreciate if someone would give me a chance and... Gorgeous woman: Hey, I would love to get to know you, and maybe take you home and... Guy: WHAT? THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN TO ME! I CANT HANDLE IT! HEEEEEEEEEEELP! (Runs out of bar screaming)

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Girl- Hey ily Boy- say it it just makes it that much better ;) Girl- I'm leaving you

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Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put I and U together Female: You don't have to do anything because N and O are already together

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You seem reasonably clean, which is always an important consideration for me when selecting a woman.

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Guy: Did you use Windex on your pants? Girl: No, why? Guy: Because I see myself in your pants.

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I put the STD in Stud all I need is U

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"Hmm...you'll do."

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Man with huge arms and HUGE muscles enters a... pub! (for variety`s sake) "Hey you like fisting!" Woman: Yeah kinda.. I mean HOLY SHIT NO! I DONT PLEASE STOP NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH! Moral: Get a room you two! (a moral man original)

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Nice legs what time do they open

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sound of zipper

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-I better drive you home, miss. Because you're a woman and you can't drive. Get it?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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