Man: HELP! I am dying of disease and have only one day left to live! My only wish... "sob" is to procreate... to have a son or a daughter... Woman: Aww... well maybe I can help you... Man: :D I cant believe it (tears in eyes) Woman: What are you dying of? Man: Aids... Woman proceeds to disappear in a ball of smoke. Moral of the story: Dunno find it yourself ffs I dont even know why people read this crap... funny typing it though.. thumbs ups for that :D

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Hey baby, you're really hot, I like girls with some meat for my bone.

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"Do you like me?" "Do pigs fly?"

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I'll punch ya!

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Wanna come home to my star destroyer and play with my lightsaber? No? How about just a trip down the Enterprise bridge to have fun with my romulans?... if you know what I mean? ;) ;)

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Babe your dad is an terorist because your a real bomb !!!

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McDonald's isn't the only thing that is super-sized...

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Why do cops eat donuts so much? Because they are delish

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Boy: Wanna go see a movie. Girl: Which movie. Boy: Texas Chainsaw Massicure. Girl: What is it about. Boy: Unicorns and Rainbows. Girl: Let's go!

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My therapist says I should meet new people.

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do you work at subway? 'cause you give me foot long. i'll do you a favour and cut it up

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For the males that do not know what I mean with "woman screams" comment below... well HAHAHAHAHAH LOSERS LOOOOOOOOOOOSEEEEEEEEERS! Moral: Read a book about females more interesting parts one day you lazy bastard... as for the girls... I am not talking about anything bad nor dirty... just 12 hour orgasms and such nice things... WHAT? YOU GONNA TELL ME THAT IS HORRIBLE? Well in that case you dont know what you are missing... and you wont ever know.... Ps: Can you believe I am actually trying to get thumbs downs but keep getting upped? Thanks for accepting my ever growing controversial nature, lets keep it that way and soon moral man will uh... receive a medal for uh... well a small keychain for... uh... you know what? Never mind.

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Guy: Hey baby, did you come by car? Girl: No I walked. Guy: Well I can make you come in mine.

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While I am certain that the police consider you a person of interest, I assure you I do not.

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I have no gag reflex.

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You look like I could use a drink - SMC Digital

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M:Hey baby you must be a GENERAL because your making my PRIVATES stand up F:Hmm, Your still a MAJOR disappointment See whaat i did tharrgh?

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"You look like an angel that fell from heaven and hit its face on the pavement."

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- I can make your wildest dreams come true. - I know. I had this nightmare some creep wouldn't leave me alone...

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Good news: you'll never-ever-ever have a zit again. Bad news: because there's no more space for it to pop out.

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adam burdass

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Hi, my name is Justin Bieber

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"Is it true you're a lesbian?"

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-I love you.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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