Man: Hey lady... you new here? I havent seen you around here before ;) Woman: Im your wife! >:/ Man: Which one of them? I have married so many sluts just to get sex with them... that I forget about...

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male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boyscout? The boyscout returned from camp.

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-I better drive you home, miss. Because you're a woman and you can't drive. Get it?

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What's worse than walking on a beach? Not walking on a beach.

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Man: Wanna see the best pick up line ever? Its an ancient secret kept for millions of years! Girl: SURE! Man: It only reveals to the fully drunk though so lets get drinking.. Girl: uh... okay... I guess.. Man: Drunk enough? Girl: Ulp... you betcha weird man! Man: Ok its hidden at my place so lets go! Girl: WOHOO!

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that shirt looks nice on you, it would look better on the floor

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He: Did it hurt? She: Aww when I fell from heaven? Thanks! He: No, when you fell from the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down. She:...

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Boy- is that a mirror in your pants? Girl-? Boy-because i see my self in your pants Girl-oh this, this is a picture of crap!

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Your father must have been a theif, because you look like a pikiey

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- Did it hurt? - Yes.

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You are the personification of beauty. ,..Wanna Shag?

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Is there a mirror in your pants? If so, you should shove it up your ass, it would probably make you look better.

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At a bar (another real life one): Man: You sort of look like a woman from a certain angle... I am so drunk I can pretend you are a woman all night long! ????: I AM A WOMAN! Man: How can we fix this so you can come home with me? Moral: Becoming unpopular was my goal, but third next to Justin Beiber? Maybe I overdid this a bit...

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-hey, come here a minute.

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Boy: Wanna go see a movie. Girl: Which movie. Boy: Texas Chainsaw Massicure. Girl: What is it about. Boy: Unicorns and Rainbows. Girl: Let's go!

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My dog just died so now you're my only Bitch.

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M: What's your name? W: Jenny. M: What's your number? W: eight-six-seven-five-three-oh-ni-yie-yen

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Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

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- You look really nice - I know

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue, Dont talk to me, and I wont talk to you.

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Did you fall from heaven because you landed on my wind shield some how

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Are you an electrician? Cuz' you turn me on.

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You're so hot that if someone threw a grenade at you, I'd probably throw it back because falling on it sounds like a really dumb idea.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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