That King that said: Kill all male babies... Lets say he was a teenager? Moral: Excellent job son, but you see, sharing is caring, have a victory drink!... Thing is... I don't care... rest well...For eternity... Hughman Heffer... The seed has been sown... you got nothing on me...

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-Nice bum where ya from? -Australia, wanna ****?

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Man: Lust is a terrible thing! Woman: I agree. Man: So come home with me and help me get rid of it.

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Guy - Did it hurt? Girl - Giving birth to my triplets? Yes, it was like shitting a walrus.

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"Next!"

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Girl, now I want you to be on top! Okay, what position? DOGGY STYLE! Moral: Sickman Fraud, with that name smart people should listen with one eye open, while geniuses keep their eyes and ears shut.

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Boy:do you know to spell "Idiot" with just one word? Girl:how? Boy:U

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"Rate your looks out of 10" "awkward... maybe 8 or 9 i guess?" "I said 10, not 100"

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(boy gives flowers to a girl) Girl: Are these for me? Boy: Nope, I just want you to hold them for me for a second..

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jack sanders

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Boy: I want to get into your pants. Girl: No way! I already have an ass in there!

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men: Do you ride horses, because I'd let you ride me all night!

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Guy: Hey babe, does the carpet match the drapes? Girl: How do you feel about hardwood?

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MAN- Wanna have sex? WOMAN- No get away from me you freak?!!! MAN- Well... I gave you a choice...

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Man: So, what's your sign? Woman: Out to lunch. Back whenever!

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Nice hair, can I pull it?

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-- Hey, can I have your number? -- 12

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- Did it hurt? - Yes.

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You look like one that does not charge for sex ;)

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Im tired of fapping... wanna help me get some variation?

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Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

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sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

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- I can tell that you want me. - Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave.

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-Hey, is there a fire extinguisher around here? 'Cause you're smoking hot. -Actually, there IS a fire extinguisher. I was about to slam you in the face with it.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!