You remind me of America. How so? Because you so fat!

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TURRETES (or however you spell it) GUY ON PICKUP! Man: IM GONNA RAPE YOUUUUUUUUUUUU! Woman: EEEEEEEEEEK! (runs away) Man: I mean... I tried to say you seem nice...:( Moral: BOB SAGET!

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The word of the day is 'legs'. Wanna come to my place and spread the word?

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the roses were red and the violets were nice but if you want to get with me you better up the price

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I have a twin bed...we should have a threesome;)))

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"I prefer animals... but your so ugly you remind me of my dog"

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- Does this rag smell like ether? - MMMPPPHHRPHRRG!

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Good news: you'll never-ever-ever have a zit again. Bad news: because there's no more space for it to pop out.

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Boy: Hey girl, do you wanna play hard to get? Girl: No. Boy: That's the spirit!

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Classic story time: Shit that happens out there. Girl: Omg that guy called you a douche! Go punch him! Or else my respect for you is gone. Man: Hey, you called me a douche right? Well... FALCOWN PAWNCH! Girl: Omg you are so violent, my respect for you is gone. Moral: Really, I am speechless... Its a lose/lose situation.

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-I like my woman like I like my coffee... without a penis

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Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my number, so shove it up your A$$.

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Don't turn this rape into a murder.

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While I am certain that the police consider you a person of interest, I assure you I do not.

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- Can I have your number? - Sure. Twelve.

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I lost my Nobel prize, can you help me find it?

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Guy: (any sexual pick up line) Girl: I'm sorry but I don't think there is enough room in my pants for two assholes.

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I take the the out of psychotherapist

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Man enters bar: Man: is there any... I mean ANY woman that would not instantly reject me here? If there is, I would like her... or in worst case scenario, HIM that she/he is very special to me and has the most beautiful eyes ever... THANK YOU

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Guy- I would do anything for you. Women- I wouldn't do you for anything!

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At the library: So girl, how about we find a nice quiet place? Moral: Location, location...

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I'm an Ice Bear, I guess i just broke the "ICE" between us ....

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I've got candy.

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i want a blowjob bitch *lifts her hijab*

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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