The word of the day is 'legs' , The word of tomorrow is Aardvark .

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Sexual harassment, it can be a touchy subject.

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Hey girl... U remind me of my pinkie toe.. Ur small cite and I'll probably bang u on the coffee table later

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Are your prices by the hour

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Guy: So how about that Tom Cruise??? Guy: ... I'm in the wrong type of bar...

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have a mac10. GET IN THE VAN.

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(this is only funny if ur a guy!) you go to a party im a man you get a drink im a man you laugh with friends im a man u see a hot chick im a man you invite her over to ur place im a man you go up in the bedroom im a man you go to pull her pants off im a man and she says... im a man!

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-Wanna have sex? -No -Damn

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Roses are red. Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Got milk? Cuz baby, im of it!

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Hey can I have your number? No.

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I don't have a library card but do you mind if I check you out?

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hi how u doin fine and u well bii have a nice day DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO

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Female: Hey do you wanna buy me a drink? Male: I really don't like your face.

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Girl: "In all of my years, I've never laid eyes on a more attractive, sensitive, and understanding man. With all of my heart, I adore you. Your eyes are pools of heavenly water, teeming with life and love; your succulent smile crafted as elegantly as Mona Lisa's. Your words could move nations; your voice could soothe beasts. Do me the ultimate pleasure of accepting my eternal devotion to you." Boy: "I'm gay."

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put you in between F and CK.

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-Are you an angel? -Yeah...actually I am. I remember you-aren't you the guy that fell out of heaven? So THAT'S why your face is so screwed up.

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Did it hurt when you burst through the concrete emerging from hell? Yes, yes it did.

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Close you`re eyes and open you`re mouth. *unzips pants*

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You have the nicest smile I could ever hope to come across.

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Look at the keyboard, u and i are together. Look underneath, it says jk.

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Dont let this rape turn into a murder

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Penis. I got it

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-Do you like me? -No

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!