Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

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Hey, I got some of the worst ratings on Horsehead network! Really? Moral: You bet!

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You belong in heaven. So make sure you say hi to God for me.

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You're gorgeous! Can you smell that? Oh god it's awful!

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Is that a banana in your pants? Can I have yours?

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Hi there, stand still, hmm, hmm... Well, your tits are firm, lets feel up ya pussy too huh? Then your... other thingie... Why you runnin? Moral: Believe in stuff!

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will you marry me

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You look like one that does not charge for sex ;)

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Man: I wanna know what love iiiiiiis... And I want you to show meeeeeeeeee! *Woman slams man with baseball bat* Man: Urgh... ARGH MY FACE BLEEDING EVERYWHERE! WHYYYY! Woman: I love baseball! Moral: Stupid singing idiot, if that is not the worst pick up line ever, then some other is!

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Is that a mirror in your pants? We should have sex immediately.

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Man : Wanna go to my house tonight? Woman : I'm not sure if a rock can fit 2 people inside.

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Man: There is a U and I in beautiful Woman: Ya, but there is only a U in ugly

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It rubs the lotion onto it's skin

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-Can I get your Number? -29435566 (see if you can get it.)

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Did you gain weight? Because I think your gravitational pull towards me just increased.

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Man: Hey you female? Cuz I am a horny man and... *door slams*

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Are u in the army cause u make my private stand at attention.

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-Adam, am I the only girl in your life? -Who else is there?

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Do you why I know we're going to have sex tonight?

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Couple in bed: Woman: I want some variation... you into roleplay? Man: Sure! Woman: Ok, Ill be a hot housemaid... Man: OK but they have little mana so... ill be a firemage! Woman: Huh? Man: SHHHH! its not your time to attack yet! Moral: Geeks...

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Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

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Hi there, the voices in my head are telling me to talk to you.

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does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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Guy: Hey, I think you're really sweet... Girl: Aww, thanks Guy: Is that why you're so fat?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!