Man: Wanna come home watch my REALLY big stamp collection? ;) ;) Girl: Sure ;) ;) At home: Man: Why are you taking your clothes off? Girl: Uh... nevermind... Moments later: Man: And this one is a rare misprint from 1980, and this one is actually quite common but.., Girl: Sigh... :(

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Hey girl, you a single mom I heard, I love that. Really? :D SURE! Hey just between us, how sexy are your kids on a scale from one to over nine thousand? Moral: Watch out ladies, I can only take care of so many of you... (you have kids? Meh, get lost,nothing personal, just you know... your kid)

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(Guy mumbles a bit, then says): You don't know me, but can I get you a drink? Yeah, sure... OK. HAHAHAA!!! Before I asked if you wanted a drink I mumbled "Do you want to have sex"? And you said yes! HAHAHAA!!!

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Excuse me lady, may I say that you got wonderful hands? Aww please yes. Would you like a drink my buy? Please :D How classy. Why thank you, would you fancy some hard anal sex on camera for end up on youtube? Moral: He is keeping it classy...

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Man: Hey babe ;) I may not be the smartest guy around, but look at these muscles! (flexes like crazy). Girl: Sorry, I am blind... Man: Oh... do you hear my sexy raspy voice though? Girl: Sorry I am also deaf... Man: Oh... (leaves) 2 Weeks later: Man: HEY THAT WOMAN TRICKED ME! SHE SAID SHE WAS DEAF BUT WAS CAPABLE OF SPEAKING! DEAF PEOPLE DO NOT SPEAK!.... I think...

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Do women shake the petrol pump after filling or is that just a guy thing?

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-If I could arrange the alphabet, that would be cool.

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Man: Do you want to have sex at my house Women: No

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There must be an angel missing from Heaven, because I've got it tied up in my basement. (It keeps saying something about a fancy dress party, but I'm not falling for that one again; that's how Batman escaped.)

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Why didn't the boy make the soccer team? He missed the tryouts

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You are the personification of beauty. ,..Wanna Shag?

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Damn you look good in beer goggles.

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all in all it was a good orgy

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Boy: did it hurt when you fell from heaven Girl: I'm a antsiest

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Man: Comon babe a little BJ wont hurt anyone get down..... Woman: sorry im alergic to peanuts

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here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

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Ever had violent sex with a murderer/rapist? ;) ;)

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-You're fat! -No I'm not. -You will be, when my dick is in you

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WOW MY LONGEST EVER COMMENT BELOW GOT A THUMBS UPS WOOT-WO-WO-WOROWOOOT *Partyravelights that confetti crap and... Moral: I dont really give a shit and all...

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-You wanna get laid tonight? -You wanna never have sex again?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm using my hand but thinking of you ;)

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Whatever I'll just date myself.

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Hey baby, have you ever been to Uranus? No? Well I am about to.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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