I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

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Violets are blue. Roses are red. Your window was open. I'm under your bed.

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Man: *Pokes Woman* Ouch! You burned me! Woman: How did I burn you? Man: Because you're just THAT hot. ;) Woman: *Pokes Man* Well it's too bad you're not.

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sHe; Theirs a "L" in love. he; and theirs a L in Lick my penis.

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Boy- Didi it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until i saw you.

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Girls hate me, they always discuss about how they regret fucking with me over and over again. Moral: Thumb me down, I know ya love me.

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MAN- You're trying to imagine me naked aren't you? WOMAN- No. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

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Hi there, the voices in my head are telling me to talk to you.

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Hi there, stand still, hmm, hmm... Well, your tits are firm, lets feel up ya pussy too huh? Then your... other thingie... Why you runnin? Moral: Believe in stuff!

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Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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i would drag my balls through miles of broken glass, just to hear you fart through a walkey-talkey

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Your hair is really beautiful. Thanks. Can I make a wig out of it?

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Boy: How much does a Polarbear weigh? Girl: How much? Boy: Just as much as me, hi my name is Ahron

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you look like my mother

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Guy: I got you a gift. It's a Necklace. Girl: Awww thats so nice. Guy: BAZINGA Its my dick.

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Charmeleon is Red, Squirtle is Blue, If you were a Pokemon, I'd choose you.

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will you marry me

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Can I go to your house and play with your Jigglypuff?

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I walked into the pub last night with a date and said to the barman, "I'll have a pint of Guinness." My date immediately looked at me and said, "Aren't you forgetting something?" "Of course, how rude of me." I said, "I'll have a pint of Guinness PLEASE."

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man: you look like my favorite girl. Girl: is that so? Man: yupp, best dog i ever had.

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Male-where have you been all my life ? Female-not in it thats for sure Male-i was singing a song i wouldn't want YOU in my life Female-i was singing a song 2 *lies*

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GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

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I think I shit myself

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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