Guy- I would do anything for you. Women- I wouldn't do you for anything!

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- Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? - No but I scraped my knees when I climbed up from hell

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Shorts and pants compilation: Hey you a cheap prostitute or just out of my league? Hey mom I just watched some more hentai today and wonder if you would... Why are you screaming? Its just me naked with a boner! According to hentai its completely natural! I mean I am getting to do you when I turn eighteen right? No? You are a horrible mother! I am so telling dad you wont give it up! Bitch, you like men that beat you up while fucking you? You do? Oh, my! This is like too freaky too me! *runs out girlie screaming* Dad, I watched some other hentai today and, I wonder if you... Moral: *Pants*, there you go.

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I have been known to give women the best fake orgasms ever ;)

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Miss excuse me but... Moral: Admitt it fucker, you cant pick up a girl by apolgizing for whatever you are gonna do beforehand. GIMME FIVE! (red thumbs, red is the color of love or something)

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-Your really nice plus i like girls with flat asses

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Man: Hello there young lady, I am Elton John and I would very much like to have sex with you! Girl: OMG ITS... Wait! Wow you look a lot like him! But you cannot be real lol *leaves* Man: Man... I look and dress just like him! What could have gone wrong? Man getting the operation cost me a fortune too! Next time I am gonna try Freddie Mercury! Moral: "Dats gay Fifthy cen... I mean Gangstalicious!"

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I really should start saying "congratulations" instead of "are you keeping it?"

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Did you gain weight? Because I think your gravitational pull towards me just increased.

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Male: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Female: did it hurt when they kicked you out of hell?

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Him: Nice legs. What time do they open? Her: Members only, I'm afraid,

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Man enters bar: Man: I AM MORAL MAN! My spear shall cut down the zealots, and my shield shall block (yeah you wish) be used as a additional weapon to push people down so I can thrust my spear even deeper into their hatred filled hearts! Woman: WOW! Moral: This pickup line wont work of course... not for you you aren`t the one and only EPIC: MORAL MAN! ;) Aka Epic man to those that still fail to understand that my morals are morals for a new order! No more religious wars, no more pedophiles, no more hatecrime... stand by me, and I shall not only speak for you, but also fight for you!

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Hey, do you want to dance? No.

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Do your parents have Down Syndrome? Because your really special.

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-I wish i were DNA helicase so i could unzip your genes. -You're a loser

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WHEN I ACTUALLY DIE SOME PEOPLE ARE GOING TO GET REALLY HAUNTED. Originally Posted at: Collection of Funny WhatsApp Status

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- I put the STD in STUD, all I need is U - ...

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A: Wanna go get some pizza and then have sex at my place?? B: No.. B: U don't like pizza? Some chinees then?

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roses are red violets are blue i have a knife get in the van

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If you were a Pokemon I'd choose you!

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can i just touch your face for like, a couple seconds.

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"My mom won't be home for hours..."

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Babe your dad is an terorist because your a real bomb !!!

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While I am certain that the police consider you a person of interest, I assure you I do not.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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