Is that a ladder in your tights or are you just a cheap whore?!

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Man: Hi ladies I am back for more if you know what I mean ;) Ladies: Get lost you damn hippie! The seventies are over! Man: Whaaat? I died for your sins you know! Moral: Ever heard of Jesus`s ladyfriends? There, now you see what I mean.

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Order Online Nightwear and short shop online in India

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Have you been followed? 'Cuz i've been seeing people behind your back.

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Gaywatch starts

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-Hey baby, are you from Tennessee? Because you're like a solid 7.

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If I said you had a beautiful body I'd be lying.

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I have a gun.

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Hey, nice shoes. Where did you buy them ? My girlfriend wants shoes like that.

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Hey baby, wanna make $50?

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Guy texting random girl: *u must b wearing space pants cuz ur a*s is out of this world *no im wearing baseball pants cuz my a*s is out of ur leage (this girl deserves an award)

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when ilfe gives you lemons i squirt the jiuce in my eyes so i dont have to stare at you anymore :)

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Mirrors can't talk, luckily for you they can't laugh either

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Would you like to come home with me you wetback spic?

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-Hey girl, is your father in prison? Because if I was your father, I'd be in prison.

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your almost as hot as my wife

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Man; Wanna play the rape game? Girl; No Man; That's the spirit

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Man: (puts on a stern face and mans up) Hey you random hoe, wanna have sex? Woman: Sigh... sure why not... at least you dont play games. Man: WHAT? IT WORKED? IT WORKEEEEED?! OMG truCKINg goD wOooooot wooooooot hell I aM gonna get laid tonight it finally worked yaehaieHeiAHEIHAIEHIAHE Wootowtowot I AM GONNA LOSE MY VIRGI... Woman: never mind, you are too noisy... Moral: Desperation... harder to hide than you think..

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Roses are red Violets are fine You be the 6 And I'll be the 9

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Drunk woman enters what she thinks is a bar... (how original). "man gets close to her" Woman: You men are all dogs! Man: Bark bark! Woman: No need to get cheeky with me asshole! Man: Bark bark... Woman proceeds to pass out and wake up at a kennel... "Mandog": Bark bark. Moral: If you think every man is a dog, then you may just be bark barking the wrong tree... or place... I mean dont expect to find nice men at a dirty bar, and dont expect to find horny jerks at your church reunion. (A moral man original... and I actually like this one!)

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole.

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hey,are you a parking ticket? because nobody likes you.

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So, you're a girl, huh?

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Do you live around here often?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!