Man: Hi ladies I am back for more if you know what I mean ;) Ladies: Get lost you damn hippie! The seventies are over! Man: Whaaat? I died for your sins you know! Moral: Ever heard of Jesus`s ladyfriends? There, now you see what I mean.

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Male: Hey do you wanna come back to my place? Female: Sorry i only sleep with dead bodies.

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Man: There is a U and I in beautiful Woman: Ya, but there is only a U in ugly

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"Hi. You're looking mightily mediocre and I would like to buy you a medium priced drink."

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If you were a booger i would pick you Good thing you have no hands

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i am with stupid l l l \/

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- Professor Dumbledore, where are we? - You're dead, stupid. Snape trolled you.

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Why do cops eat donuts so much? Because they are delish

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Hey wanna have sex and get married! ......... sorry.......

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Guy: Can we go on a date? Girl: A date? You couldn't find a date if I handed you a bag of fruit!

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A couple wanted to try something different in the bedroom, The wife suggests they do it in a 69 position so they get into position but the wife lets one off in the husbands face she apologises and they try again when the wife farts again the husband gets up to leave and says no I don't think I can do this another 67 times!

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Your breast is like a beer holder, you would allow me to store beer in between your breasts, while I talk on the phone

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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- Hey, baby, what's your sign? - Do not Enter

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Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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Man: Wanna come to my place? Woman: Maybe if you take of the ski-mask and black clothing... Man: But then you'll ruin the surprise! :(

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I'd hit that.... with a truck.

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-hey baby wanna get a drink? -no but i wanna get the heck away from you

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That outfit looks great on you.. .. It would look even better crumpled up in a pile in an evidence bag

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Male: I'd give her one Female: I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last person on earth Male: I was rating you out of 10 you ugly bitch

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HONEY! I SEE MEDUSA!!!!!!!!!!! oh wait, it was just you

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I put the STD in STUD, now all I need is U.

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Boy- is that a mirror in your pants? Girl-? Boy-because i see my self in your pants Girl-oh this, this is a picture of crap!

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-Hey, baby, What's your sign? -Stop.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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