- Anti-Pickup Line

Your skin would make a nice coat.

Guy for a girl with a dog: -Does the dog have a cell phone? -Why? is your mom in heat?

Man- Hey, baby, wanna come back to my house for some pizza and sex? Woman- No! Man- What's wrong, you don't like pizza?

Knock Knock... Who's there Want Want who Want who fuck

You must have a large mass because i am highly attracted to you

Are you a computer technician? Because you turn my hardware into software.

Give me some sugar... honey.

My therapist says I should meet new people.

Male- You have 206 bones in your body, You want another ?

Man - Hey you're kinda pretty! Woman - Um thanks... Man - Whoa slow down! I said kinda.

Man - I know I don't look like much now, but I'm drinking milk. Woman - Not mine!

Male: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Female: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore

For you that think your family are too overprotective when it comes to sex, this was my story as a teenager. Mom: Hi guys! Me and ladyfriend: Hi mom! This is my ladyfriend: (insert your name if you are female) Dad: Woho! Good catch son! claps me on shoulder Mom: Dont worry, you guys just go right up and "study" eh ;) eh ;) and we are gonna put the music REALLY LOUD down here! And there is no need to be ashamed of stains nor anything. Dad: No we understand ;) ;) ;) Girl: Uh... you invited me just to study right? Me: Believe it or not I did... Dad: Yeah you two young ones go study! Remember condom though! ;) Girl: Axel! WTF?! leaves Me: Mom.. Dad! WTF!? I dont know anything about algebra (not even to this day, and I am almost 30) Dad: Algebra eh? ;) Next time give her a good "algebra". Me: Mom tell that moron tha... Mom: Relax son, I understand that you boys have desires and the next time you take her with you, you dont need to be ashamed or come up with excuse.. Me: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUU! Moral: To believe I learned most my ways by having ladyfriends... despite my parents... Mom and Dad overprotective? Good... trust me!

He: Hey bay wanna danc- She: Leave.

Stories from real life part whatever: Me as a twelve year old: Yeah I am incredibly experienced with girls, I mean I know I look very young for a eighteen year old man, but I consider it a advantage of mine... Seventeen year old girl: Really? You are eighteen? Me: Of course, besides II have had intercourse hundred of times, mostly with married women, I enjoy being their "guilty pleasure" Girl: I bet you haven't seen boobs like these though! shows me boobs Me: OMG! HOLY SHIT REAL BEEWBS! OMG HOLY CRAP THEY LOOK INCREDIBLE HOLY SHIT EVERYONE I JUST SAW REAL LIFE TITS! I am a winner! Last thing I remember was getting slapped several times and getting spit on, I was too damn happy to give a damn, I was victory. Moral: had you asked me if it worked by then id say "hell yes!", today I doubt it worked as well as it could have...

Ever kissed a bunny inbetween the ears? Nope. I'm allergic to them.

I hope you want kids, cause i've left my condoms at my girlfriends place.

Man: Wanna hear a joke about my Cck, nevermind, it's too long Woman: Wanna hear a joke about my Pssy, oh wait you'll never get it

Male - Your a sight for sore eyes Female - And your a sight that causes sore eyes

It's not Rapee If you yell surprise!

Are you from Tennessee? Because I have a lot of family that lives there, maybe we're related.

Does this rag smell like chloroform?

"You look like Carmen Electra's deformed, burned, dismembered sister..."

Male: You're so beautiful. Female: Well thank you. Male: Yeah, you look just like my Mom.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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